story time
"The patient came in with a chief complaint of severe and several granulomatous lesions on her arm," my classmate said very matter-of-factly.
"That's what she said?" Our preceptor looked up from his own notes with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Oh no," my colleague responded. "I got this information from the nurse."
"The history of present illness should come from what the patient tells you," our preceptor reiterated for maybe the seventeenth time. "Gather data first; analyze later."
I feel like so often we jump to the assessment and plan, even in our everyday lives. I don't just assess, I ruminate, I judge myself--I get stressed about having to deal with myself the next morning. I waste time yelling at myself for procrastinating, and then I procrastinate more by yelling at myself, and then because I'm so mad at myself, I end up deciding that no Shreya, you are so emotionally wounded now so maybe you need a little break before you actually start studying
What is this nonsense? Why can't I also just gather data, listen to myself, just patiently witness the signs and symptoms of the current issue that I'm dealing with
instead of interrupting myself with constant judgements
I get so overwhelmed sometimes by the sheer amount of work I have that I end up just not doing anything. And then I feel guilty about not doing anything, and worse, guilty about feeling stressed about something that so many people have done before me.
"I didn't get to go through the case before class today," a friend was telling me, as we filed into the lecture hall after our lunch break.
"Yeah I looked over it during lunch," I told her.
"My daughter kept me up till 6AM!"
"...I was up till 1..studying..mostly"
I WASTE SO MUCH TIME COMPLAINING ABOUT MY LIFE THAT REALLY ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO TERRIBLE
INSTEAD OF JUST LIVING THE LIFE THAT I AM ACTUALLY TRULY VERY GRATEFUL FOR ON GOOD DAYS
And then I feel guilty for not only complaining, but also for wasting the time that other people are spending with their sick kids and elderly parents. I can't even call my mom back, for heavens sake.
Sometimes I feel selfish, sometimes I feel useless. Sometimes I feel like I take this beautiful opportunity for granted, and sometimes I feel like maybe I'm not cut out for this.
And then I realize, oh my god thinking all of this out is completely useless at this moment so you should just get over it and get back to work. Maybe you will learn not by thinking and ruminating, but just by going through the motions, faking it till you make it
and then some day in the future you can retrospectively blog about this and be like WOW I REALLY GREW DURING THAT TIME
not just my waistline
...beautiful. another twenty minutes down the drain.
if you don't mind me I'm about to get back to my history
and one day youll be like whoa listen to herstory
trust me you will have something to listen to, I can go on and on for days
"That's what she said?" Our preceptor looked up from his own notes with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Oh no," my colleague responded. "I got this information from the nurse."
"The history of present illness should come from what the patient tells you," our preceptor reiterated for maybe the seventeenth time. "Gather data first; analyze later."
I feel like so often we jump to the assessment and plan, even in our everyday lives. I don't just assess, I ruminate, I judge myself--I get stressed about having to deal with myself the next morning. I waste time yelling at myself for procrastinating, and then I procrastinate more by yelling at myself, and then because I'm so mad at myself, I end up deciding that no Shreya, you are so emotionally wounded now so maybe you need a little break before you actually start studying
What is this nonsense? Why can't I also just gather data, listen to myself, just patiently witness the signs and symptoms of the current issue that I'm dealing with
instead of interrupting myself with constant judgements
I get so overwhelmed sometimes by the sheer amount of work I have that I end up just not doing anything. And then I feel guilty about not doing anything, and worse, guilty about feeling stressed about something that so many people have done before me.
"I didn't get to go through the case before class today," a friend was telling me, as we filed into the lecture hall after our lunch break.
"Yeah I looked over it during lunch," I told her.
"My daughter kept me up till 6AM!"
"...I was up till 1..studying..mostly"
I WASTE SO MUCH TIME COMPLAINING ABOUT MY LIFE THAT REALLY ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO TERRIBLE
INSTEAD OF JUST LIVING THE LIFE THAT I AM ACTUALLY TRULY VERY GRATEFUL FOR ON GOOD DAYS
And then I feel guilty for not only complaining, but also for wasting the time that other people are spending with their sick kids and elderly parents. I can't even call my mom back, for heavens sake.
Sometimes I feel selfish, sometimes I feel useless. Sometimes I feel like I take this beautiful opportunity for granted, and sometimes I feel like maybe I'm not cut out for this.
And then I realize, oh my god thinking all of this out is completely useless at this moment so you should just get over it and get back to work. Maybe you will learn not by thinking and ruminating, but just by going through the motions, faking it till you make it
and then some day in the future you can retrospectively blog about this and be like WOW I REALLY GREW DURING THAT TIME
not just my waistline
...beautiful. another twenty minutes down the drain.
if you don't mind me I'm about to get back to my history
and one day youll be like whoa listen to herstory
trust me you will have something to listen to, I can go on and on for days
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